Goat Simulator

Goat Simulator

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How To Be A Goat
By mr j joker wick
This Guide will teach you how to move past the Simulation Stage and become an actual Goat.
   
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What is A Goat?
A Goat is a hardy domesticated ruminant animal that has backward curving horns and (in the male) a beard. It is kept for its milk and meat and is noted for its lively and frisky behavior.
How to Simulate being A Goat
A Goat can do what we call "Mutating", and it can mutate into many other creatures. To help you on your Path to becoming a goat, we suggest playing the very accurate Goat Simulator. Observe the way the Goat rides a skateboard, which you can find in Goat bay or whatever the name of that ****y town is. Observe the way a goat uses a jetpack. Observe the way a Goat does 1080 Triple Backflip off a building, and you human, will soon have the ability to mutate into a goat. Play the game for about 100 Hours to get the feel of a goats life.
How to Do the Transformation From Simulation to actual Goat.
In Order to actually be a goat, you will have to unlock all achievements, purchase all DLC (and get those achivements) and, that's including the soundtrack. In order to be a goat you need to get all trophies and read the spoiler text once you have done all of this.
How to Finally Be a Goat
Haven't You Realized?
There's no way to be a goat. It's impossible. For a human like you, no matter if you could mutate you will never be able to match the intelligence, the superiority or how dominant they are. They rule while we humans think we do. Goats are exactly where they want to be. And as you can tell yourself, you are desperate to stop simulating and be a goat. THAT WILL NEVER HAPPEN.
HAVE FUN SIMULATING
46 Comments
Meme_ 8 Jul @ 8:55am 
moo
:steamhappy:
Bat_Soldier 6 Jul @ 10:10am 
maa
Arkanist 2 Jul, 2024 @ 7:21pm 
maa
Andrew 2 Jul, 2024 @ 6:23pm 
no
[thebiggesthorngöat] 9 Apr, 2024 @ 8:07pm 
nice guide, now i became a goat now fr
Arkanist 24 May, 2023 @ 3:31pm 
don't worry bout my achievements
mr j joker wick  [author] 23 May, 2023 @ 7:02pm 
all i can say is 18/127 my friend, 18/127
Arkanist 23 May, 2023 @ 10:06am 
It's been almost a entire year and the goat gods still got me hooked up bruh i stay winning
Arkanist 12 Jul, 2022 @ 8:26am 
Nah…. Quit playin
mr j joker wick  [author] 11 Jul, 2022 @ 11:54pm 
the goat gods bent me over and spread my cheeks yall jelly